This is a final task reflection moment/update - read at your own risk

For my final task I challenged myself to do a mini photo series, where I photograph people and talk to them a little bit about gender issues.

I picked this subject specifically because it's something I'm really passionate about. Growing up in a latin and predominantly Catholic country means if you're not careful you'll grow up with pretty misogynistic and patriarchal views of the world. Which was true for me until my late teens.

For a long time, and know that nowadays I'm pretty embarrassed and disappointed in myself, I really did believe that a woman's worth was somehow related to her clothing. And that wearing too much make-up meant "slutty" or "easy". That girls should be careful with the amount of guys they hooked up with. And that guys were supposed to be the ones to go after girls, never the other way around.

I'm not proud of any of this, but that was the environment I was brought up in.

I can't pinpoint exactly when this changed, I just remember thinking at some point that this all sounded like bullshit. Who cares how long a skirt is? Who cares how much make-up one does or doesn't wear? What does the amount of people someone sleeps with say about them?

And from then on I started noticing the little things.

How my grandpa always expected me, my mom or my sister to get his dinner ready.
How even though my parents never raised me with marriage as my "ultimate life goal", when my best friend got a boyfriend and stopped hanging out with me my mom just said: "well, a boyfriend is a serious matter"; as if our friendship wasn't.
How when I went out to clubs guys would touch me before even talking to me.
How the fact that my friends got more catcalled than me made me feel ugly.
How me and my classmates got called out for wearing the uniforms skirts too short, when the school itself decided that we had to wear skirts.
How military service in most countries is only mandatory for men.
How a guy once tried to explain to me how the church I was baptised and raised in worked, whilst telling me I was wrong.
How my grandpa did not shed a single tear when my grandma died because he believes that men don't cry.
How I watched my friends getting involved with older men only using them for sex.
How my best friend's lack of girlfriends automatically meant he was secretly gay.
How Brazil is trying to approve a law that deems abortion in case of rape illegal.

Then I became a full blown feminist who tried to make everyone see they needed to join the fight,  but now I just want to burn down the patriarchy; backup or not.

And with all I mentioned, you can see I had it easy. But I watched firsthand friends and acquaintances going through much more complicated situations because of rape culture, sexism, and toxic masculinity.

That's why I'm so passionate about this. Gender is something that needs to be talked about, because people experience it in very different ways. The issues surrounding gender are infinite, and as proud as I am of how media seems to be approaching the subject more and more, it's still not enough. There's not enough representation, not enough information. I've lost count of how many times I've had to explain to relatives that sexuality and gender identity are completely different things. And I'm happy to do it. I'll do it as much as I need to, if it means that at some point they'll understand, cause understanding leads to respect. Misinformation is what causes prejudice and fear.

Onto the work itself: 

It has been one of the most rewarding things I've done in 2018. I've talked to 5 people so far with completely different approaches to the subject: gender identity, misogyny, toxic masculinity, and gender roles. Even though I consider myself a pretty open-minded individual, this was even more mind broadening.

And when it came to the pictures, I was completely out of my comfort zone. I've been dabbling with photography for the past 7 years, only really getting into it 4 years ago. Portraits and directing models was never my thing, because for some reason I become shy. Directing non models is even harder. But I still had a lot of fun with the visual part of the work.

Going through the recordings of the conversations and selecting which quotes to use is the hardest part of the job so far, because so many interesting things were said. I've been having a hard time making those decisions.

Conclusion confession: I sometimes use this task to postpone finishing tasks for my other courses.

And that's called productive procrastination, right?